Self-Validated Intimacy & Being a Lover in the Largest Sense
I wrote recently about how the world needs more Lovers — people who say yes to life in all its forms and refuse what is not life-giving...
Tantric Experiments for the Holidays: Change it Up and Gather the Data
A key tantric idea that Erik and I play with a lot is “Everything is an Experiment.” Erik likes to say, “Doing the same thing is an...
Temple Time: a Practice for Lovers
Here is one of Erik and my favorite experiments to shake things up and re-connect. Temple Time is sacred time or simply "time set apart"...
The New Macho: An Antidote to Adult Boys Running Amok
I like being macho. Amelia likes my macho when I direct the full force of my masculinity towards her, use it to create a safe space, plan...
The World Needs Lovers (Our Work with Couples)
One way to frame the work that Erik and I are doing with couples is that we are creating a link from being a good and skilled lover in...
The Big Five Personality Test: Cambridge Analytica, Odd Ducks, and the Predictability of Our Behavi
Cambridge Analytica captured the data of 87 million Facebook users, without their consent, and then used that data to target them with...
Use the verbal "cutting strike" to neutralize a psychological attack
In a physical attack, we use an angled strike to deflect or nullify the attacker’s punch or kick. This keeps the attacker from striking...
Neutralizing Interpersonal Attacks
Basic Mistakes Any attack is a matter of force impacting structure: In a physical attack, the structure consists of the body and how it...
A tiny dialogue between lovers on the victim stance and a more appealing alternative (with diagram!)
Erik: At this point in my life, with hopefully around a third to go, I am only willing to work with people who are up for taking...
Five Practices to Increase Your Pleasure
A major principle in Tantra is the healing power of pleasure. Pleasure and play are not frivolous or pleasant extras after your work is...
